Gendered Game Design

There is gendered game design.  That’s not wrong, diversity in games is good!

My knee-jerk reaction is often based on skepticism at the human’s ability to take anything seriously.  They sometimes don’t take me seriously, but I often feel it’s because they are threatened or attracted to me.  This feeling of idolization by the people in game design could be in my head, I’m not sure.  It doesn’t matter to me, personally.

It starts to matter when you step on the toes the people around you that are desperately trying to learn.    I have a menagerie of issues, but that’s not an excuse for not paying attention to someone who is talking; get help if you want it, look hard.

I grew up with a family who didn’t necessarily understand the Video Game Design industry.  My dad played videogames and my mom claims that’s why he failed out of college.  My earliest memory of my dad is him telling me I could be anything I wanted.  My earliest memory of my parents is them telling me children should be seen and not heard.

At my cousin’s house I got to play the classic games on the classic consoles and have open and honest discussions about what we liked and didn’t like, it may have been a bit harsh but it was my only hope for a conscious future.  As I grew up I got more into AAA studios, fell in love with one, and then let it go.

I am very good at following directions; I think a lot of females are by nature. The females in game design know that it’s a cut-throat industry because we often have to deal with the cut-throat part.  People are beginning to see the power of video games, other people are seeing the wealth that can come from them, everyone wants in- and they’re losing sense of themselves along the way.

Males often approach gendered games with a positive attitude.  Females often approach gendered games with a positive attitude.

Males often approach gendered games with a negative attitude.  Females often approach gendered games with a negative attitude.

I often feel that when I ask for help from game designers about something that is important to me they brush it off.  I get it, we’re all busy.  I often feel that men stand up for me without me asking them to.

I really, really hate that.

Everyone who is up and coming in game design right now probably had some semblance of a sheltered life, if you didn’t then your perspective is unique and your voice matters, male, female, or other.

 

I HAVE AN INCREDIBLY BIASED OPINION: THAT’S THE PROBLEM.  I CAN’T WORK WELL IN GROUPS BECAUSE THE WAY I GIVE FEEDBACK COMES OFF AS SARCASM.  I am flexible in what roles I can play and people don’t support that flexibility, that’s not a problem for me but it might be for the industry.

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HOW POPULAR CULTURE AFFECTED MY PERSPECTIVE IN 2012 **CRINGE WORTHY**

My identity is still pending AND THAT’S OK.

My thoughts aren’t always linear AND IT’S CHILL.

Here is the earliest completed sketchbook from UW-Stout that I can find.  Brian Ritchie assigned us 30 self portraits over the course of a semester and I whined about it internally/externally the whole semester.  P.S. I had a terrible attitude my first 3 or so years of college and it still haunts me most days;  I cringe at myself hard and often, and I love that I have the ability to face and acknowledge rejection.

SHOUT-OUT TO MY HOMIES IN DRAWING 2 AND BRIAN RITCHIE AND EVERY PROFESSOR I HAD ; ANYONE WHO HAS BEEN MY FRIEND

In hindsight, Drawing 2 was one of my favorite classes.  I would include Drawing 1 as well, but I was so nervous to be around so many creative minds, my tendency to be anxious in social situations won.  That’ll happen.

THAT’S LIFE HOMIE.

I feel I never really properly thanked Brian Ritchie for being one of the many and extraordinary professors I interacted with at UW-Stout.  UW-Stout taught me to think for myself.  I never really took the time to embrace my own thoughts because I was trying so hard to fit in to the standards that were set for me.  This isn’t a rant about any social movement, this is how I was raised.  It was just Elementary School, Middle School, High School all over again; just patterns.

This is my last year at Stout and I honestly can’t wait to leave what I feel is often petty drama, whether it is or not.  BUT, bad attitude or not- the professors I met and the peers I interacted with changed the course of life.  I could never ever re-pay you guys for everything you did for me without even knowing it.  Every smile my friends shot my way, any stupid pun, it all helped.  I have some semblance of a goal/ vision in my head for the first time in a long time.  THANK YOU.

SHOUTSOUT ALSO TO MY FAMILY MA DAD ADAM JORDON TIM KAREN LORI LINDSEY JOHN AHHHHH ALL OF THEM+++++++++++MORE

Is this getting too emotional?  HERE’S SOME CRINGEY-ASS SELF PORTRAITS!  Every drawing is associated with a song lyric that was probably important to me at some point because I think in song lyrics sometimes.  Don’t get it twisted;  I love these drawings.  They are so honest.  I experimented with some cheap medias and it was one of the most fun things I have done artistically.

EXPLORATION IS FUN

Popular culture still affects me a lot because I listen to rap songs mostly but I think it’s OK.  Also, I thought I’d give you guys one last glimpse at me doing everything incorrectly: SHITTY, POORLY CROPPED SCANS INCLUDED!

EVERYTHING IS OK UNTIL IT ISN’T.  FIND BALANCE.  KNOW YOUR LIMITS.

TRY.

i’LL SHARE SOME MORE adnvanced sketches later – maybe I’ll show you some of my game stuff!  MAYBE I’LL MAKE A TUMBLR!  MAYBE I’LL MAKE MY OWN SITE! I DUNNO!  IT’S OK!

LOVE LOVE

20-23 YEAR OLD ALYSSA 🙂

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Consider UW-Stout

After attending two other colleges, I found the place I belong at UW-Stout.  Consider educating yourself there!

University of Wisconsin - Stout

UW-Stout

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Reddit

I often browse Reddit for enjoyment or inspiration for artwork.

https://i1.wp.com/www.moma.org/images/dynamic_content/exhibition_page/29246.jpg

The art subredditArtwork by William Kentridge

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